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I guess life is fine. Apparently feeling crappy is a choice, and I… - Thrillington Rockingham Crimes, Esquire [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Thrillington Rockingham Crimes, Esquire

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[May. 31st, 2012|07:25 pm]
Thrillington Rockingham Crimes, Esquire
I guess life is fine. Apparently feeling crappy is a choice, and I need to change something in order to not feel crappy. Also I can't change anyone but myself. I don't hate myself. I actually quite like myself. I just don't like being incredibly lonely and having a lot of "friends" that either don't hang out or can't hang out. So, logically I should make new friends, but I don't hate myself and genuinely like the friends I have and most people I do meet either don't like me or don't want to/can't/don't have time to hang out. To change my opinions and beliefs makes me even more depressed because that causes feeling like less of a person/individual. It's not even about changing something. The depression is not caused by my love of music and playing music, or comics, or watching tv or going to work or enjoying beverages. Those are the things that keep me plodding along and generally happy enough to at least believe in existing. 99% of the time when I'm invited to do something and not otherwise busy with commitments....I do it. It hurts and makes me miserable to be told that I'm responsible for feeling bad.

So once again, life is fine. Being incredibly depressed and lonely is fine.
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